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appearance of the Chancel by over-elaborate decorations only mar the grandeur of this sacred place. .... (also titled “Prince of Denmarks' March"). Rigaudon.
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Trinity United Methodist Church Wedding Policy

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS Can a non-member be married at Trinity? Yes, as long as the Trinity pastor approves. What if I live out-of-town? It is not infrequent that couples who live outside Charleston are married at Trinity. For couples who can come to Charleston four times prior to the wedding service, the pastor is pleased to meet with them for four sessions of pre-marital counseling. If the couple is unable to get to Charleston four times, the pastor and couple can mutually arrange for counseling in their area. The pastor is trained in the PREPARE/ENRICH counseling discipline. The counseling does not cost extra. How far in advance should I reserve the church facilities? Plan to inquire about reserving the church facilities as early as you can. What kind of wedding service can I have? Weddings at Trinity follow the Service of Christian Marriage of The United Methodist Church only. You can catch a glimpse of the service by looking at page 864 and following in a United Methodist Hymnal or come by the church. Do I have to be a United Methodist to be married at Trinity? No, you don't have to be United Methodist. Whatever your tradition (denomination) is, the pastor will engage you in conversation about active participation in a local congregation. Among other things, he will ask where you currently worship or plan to worship. Again, we use the Service of Christian Marriage of The United Methodist Church.

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FIRST STEPS Call the church office at (843) 722-8449 or e-mail the church at [email protected]. Ask whether the wedding date you are interested in is available. We would be pleased to schedule an appointment for you to see the sanctuary and to meet with the pastor and wedding director, if you'd like. Before you complete an application and send it and a deposit in, be sure to speak with the pastor. Wedding dates must be approved by the pastor. SCHEDULING THE FACILITIES To reserve dates for a wedding and rehearsal, contact the church secretary, speak with the pastor, and complete and send in your application and deposit. Wedding dates will be secured upon receipt of the required application and deposit. Weddings and rehearsals will not be scheduled for the following holidays: New Year’s Eve, New Year’s Day, Holy Week (the week before Easter), Easter, after December 18, on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. Two weddings on the same day will be scheduled a minimum of three (3) hours apart. No weddings may begin after 7:30p.m. This enables both the church staff and wedding party ample preparation time. AVAILABLE FACILITIES 1. Sanctuary Seats @ 300 (downstairs) and 100+ (balcony) 2. Chapel Seats @ 25 The church facilities will be open two (2) hours prior to the ceremony unless coordinated with our wedding director at least 10 days prior to the wedding. The parties concerned should see that all articles of clothing and items of personal property are removed immediately after the ceremony because all buildings are closed and locked as soon as possible. Trinity United Methodist Church cannot assume responsibility for any items of personal property prior to, during, or following the ceremony. THE WEDDING The fact that you wish to be married at Trinity United Methodist Church indicates your desire for a Christian service. Because you, the prospective bride and groom, are coming together to ask God’s blessing upon your union, every aspect of this service should be characterized with not only dignity, reverence, and joy, but also by the awareness of the presence of Christ in your lives. Because Trinity is a United Methodist congregation, the order of the service shall follow the liturgy of The United Methodist Church. The United Methodist Service of Christian Marriage is the only service used at Trinity. The Service of Christian Marriage can be found on page 864 of the United Methodist Hymnal. Those who are a part of your wedding are not simply spectators or witnesses. They are participants and worshipers. This includes your wedding party, your families, and guests. Celebrating Holy Communion is encouraged but not mandated. If Holy Communion is celebrated, all present at your wedding must be given the opportunity to commune. Please speak to the pastor about the significance and theology of Holy Communion and its importance in the Service of Christian Marriage.

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WEDDING DIRECTOR If you choose to employ an outside wedding planner, please be advised Trinity Church’s wedding director will be in charge at the rehearsal and ceremony. No outside professional director is necessary for the service or rehearsal. OFFICIATING MINISTER It is the policy of Trinity United Methodist Church that Reverend Daniel Flessas be in charge of any wedding in this church. When desired, it is fine to have another United Methodist minister to assist, provided Reverend Flessas is consulted and approves. Other clergy must be approved by Reverend Flessas. The bride and groom should immediately consult Reverend Flessas regarding pre-marital sessions prior to the wedding. The purpose of pre-marital counseling is to consider the strengths and growing areas of the present relationship, prepare for marriage, strengthen one's relationship with God and the church, and to prepare and plan for the wedding service. The pastor will ensure that the couple is familiar with the rules and guidelines of the Trinity Wedding Handbook. The pastor of Trinity is well trained in pre-marital counseling, and his intent is to provide an occasion for the bride and groom to examine their relationship in a thoughtful way. It is an appropriate way for you to consider the many decisions involved in your wedding. You will be in control of what you say; your privacy will be respected; and the discussions will be held in strictest confidence. Normally, the pastor who officiates at the wedding will lead the pre-marital counseling. It is his desire that you are adequately prepared for this important moment in your lives, and he welcomes the sense of friendship and trust that results from these sessions. If, however, for reasons of distance and circumstance, this is not possible, another person, whose qualifications and skills our pastor recognizes, may be called upon. Trinity’s pastor believes that pre-marital counseling is vital. He believes that the first session should be scheduled as near as possible to the beginning of the engagement. Normally, pastor and couple hold four sessions. FEES The following are the fees that are appropriate for the services by the staff of Trinity in regard to your wedding. To qualify for no rental fee for use of buildings, the bride, groom or their parents, must be active members (your prayers, your presence, your gifts, your service, and your witness) and have been on the active membership rolls of Trinity Church for two years prior to application. Non-members are required to complete the wedding application and submit a deposit of $800.00 (payment to Trinity UMC) to secure their desired date on the Trinity wedding calendar. Our organist is a very capable musician. Even if you choose to use a string ensemble, harpist, etc. for your wedding, our organist shall be paid her fee. The fees are listed below. Total cumulative cost is determined by the facilities requested and the month the wedding occurs. USE OF BUILDINGS Sanctuary (Year-round) Chapel (for weddings of 25 or fewer, w/rehearsal) Chapel (for weddings of 25 or fewer, w/ no rehearsal) Fellowship Hall PERSONNEL FEES Minister

$1,600 $400 $300 $200

$400

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Organist Wedding Director Sexton

$300 $300 $200

DEPOSIT REQUIRED: For Sanctuary weddings (year-round), an $800 deposit (for use of facility) with completed application sent to Trinity is required to reserve a date. The remaining $800 is required to be received by Trinity thirty days prior to the wedding. Payments for personnel also must be made 30 days PRIOR to the wedding. Personnel checks should be made out to staff personnel individually, not to the church: Minister $400 (Rev. Daniel Flessas) Organist $300 Wedding Director $300 (Helen Robbins) Sexton $200 (Larry Lightly) Total non-member fees (sanctuary & personnel) are $2,800.00 (year-round). MUSIC Once the date of the wedding is placed on the church calendar, the Organist should be contacted and an appointment made to discuss the music for the ceremony. Music, as used in the service of the church, is an expression of worship. Because a wedding is considered to be a public act of worship, sacred music selected for this service shall be that which is considered appropriate to the traditions of this congregation and The United Methodist Church. You will receive a recommended list of music with the Wedding Guidelines. Secular love songs, ballads, rock, or folk rock no matter how beautiful, are not appropriate for the ceremony. All music selected is subject to the approval of the Organist in consultation with the pastor. All music will be played by the Organist or instrumentalist, or sung by the soloist. As to vocal music, placement in the wedding ceremony will depend upon the number of selections and their text as approved by the Organist. No recorded music may be used. Congregational singing is appropriate at a wedding and even encouraged, enabling the assembled worshipers to participate in the service more fully. SELECTING MUSIC The music at your wedding is a very important part of the service. Always remember that your wedding ceremony is a church service. The music should enhance the spirituality and the beauty of the worship experience. Therefore, all music will have to be approved by our organist/choirmaster who will be happy to help you in any way as you plan for this special event. Be sure to contact the Director of Music at [email protected] for assistance, advice or help in planning the music for your service. Music for your wedding needs to be provided 30 days prior to the service. MUSIC FOR PRELUDE The first music that guests will hear as they enter the Sanctuary for your wedding is the prelude. The prelude usually begins 30 minutes before the service as the guests begin to arrive. This music is typically selected by the organist. Requested selections, however, can be discussed and agreed upon by the bride, groom, and organist. CHOOSING MUSIC FOR SPECIFIC TIMES IN THE CEREMONY: It can be very effective to choose music for specific times in the ceremony. For example: 

Music for the seating of the mothers and grandmothers

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  

Music for Procession of the Wedding Party Music for Procession of the Bride Music for the Recessional

The organist at Trinity will provide you with a list of approved music selections as well as a website for listening to these suggestions. RING BEARER/FLOWER GIRLS Prior to the time the ring bearer and flower girl process down the aisle, either a parent or a designated adult must accompany the children. When it’s time for the grandparents and parents to be ushered in, they may leave the children and take their seats. THE MARRIAGE LICENSE The marriage license must be secured at the County Court House in the office of the Probate Court. It should be brought to the church at the rehearsal and given to the presiding minister. No wedding will be performed without a license. Immediately following the wedding ceremony, the presiding minister will have the license signed by the bride and groom. BULLETINS/ORDER OF WORSHIP The bride and groom are responsible for making and printing the bulletins containing the order of worship for your Service of Christian Marriage. A page in the wedding package you receive will guide you as to which headers to include in the order of worship. You must send your final version of the bulletin/order of worship to the pastor for approval before you go to print. PHOTOGRAPHY Once the service begins, no photography by guests is allowed. Official wedding photographers may take pictures as long as they are without a flash and without movement. If desired, the official photographer may take a photograph of the bride and her father in the Narthex as they arrive, as they process down the aisle. The official photographer may also take a photograph of the bride and groom as they depart, at the end of the service. Out of respect for the religious ceremony taking place, photographers should refrain from distracting movement during the ceremony. The bridal party may return to the church after the ceremony for as many pictures as they wish. The wedding director and/or pastor reserves the right to restrict any photographer and/or stop the ceremony if photographers (professional or wedding guests) do not abide by the church’s policy. It is the bride's responsibility to contact the professional photographer to ensure they understand the rules. DECORATIONS The general rule for decorating the church for weddings is that the Chancel is designed for all worship services and a wedding is a worship service. Our sanctuary is a place of unique and dignified beauty. It does not require “decorations” to make it suitable for a wedding. Efforts to change the appearance of the Chancel by over-elaborate decorations only mar the grandeur of this sacred place. It has been described by many as “Charleston’s most beautiful church for a wedding.” No decorations are permitted which conflict in any way with city fire ordinances. Pews may not be blocked in any way. Only Trinity’s candelabras may be used and Trinity will supply all candles used for the wedding. Absolutely nothing shall be attached to any of the brass candelabra. No nails, tacks, wire, gummed or scotch tape, or thorny vines or evergreens, may be put in or on the walls, woodwork, columns, pews, chancel rail, furniture, or choir rail of the church building or any other building. The following regulations are thus given to preserve the proper atmosphere of the church and to safeguard the furnishings. No pew or regular furniture may be moved. Under no

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circumstances will the pulpit, communion table, the bible, cross, baptismal font, seasonal paraments and banners, candles or Christ Candle be moved. All wedding decorations whether in the sanctuary or elsewhere, must be done under the supervision of and with the approval of the wedding director. The florist/decorator must contact the wedding director concerning the time desired for decoration. The bride must also inform the florist/decorator of rules for the floral decorations. The sanctuary's center aisle is carpeted, making any type of aisle cloth unnecessary. If desired for evening weddings, the church will place a white candle encased in a clear glass globe in each of the side windows. Only church supplied equipment may be used in the windows. Additional decoration such as greenery in the windows is the responsibility of the bride or her florist. All decorations should be removed from the sanctuary immediately after the wedding. The altar flowers will remain in the church for the following day’s worship service and proper recognition may be given in the church bulletin. Florists may not arrive earlier than two hours before the wedding starts unless the bride/groom have made a special request of the wedding director. Such requests must be made at least two weeks before the wedding date. All weddings held in the Chapel should be simple. Only one (1) vase of flowers and the altar candles will be used. SEXTON Trinity employs a sexton who will ensure that the church is open, lights are on, heating/air conditioning on, and all is ready one (1) hour before the rehearsal and two (2) hours before the wedding unless prior plans have been made with the wedding director. The sexton will be present at both the rehearsal and wedding. OTHER REGULATIONS ALCOHOL. Alcoholic beverages and other drugs are not allowed on church property. Members of the wedding party are strictly enjoined that under no circumstances may they come to the rehearsal or the wedding under the influence of alcohol or drugs. The minister has complete authority to cancel a wedding at the last moment for any deviation from this rule. Remember that the rehearsal and wedding are religious services--avoid embarrassment. THROWING CONFETTI, ETC. No rice, confetti, or other items may be thrown in the church, chapel, or on the grounds, portico, steps, or sidewalk. SMOKING. Smoking is not permitted in the church buildings or on church property. FINAL INSTRUCTIONS AND REMINDERS The responsible party must fill out and return to Trinity United Methodist Church the following before the wedding is officially placed on the calendar: A non-refundable check for $800 to place your wedding on the calendar. The application/“Bride’s Checklist.” This is the information sheet which contains personal information as well as gives us information about number of bridesmaids, groomsmen, florist, photographer, etc.

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Pay careful attention to the music/organist information following this document. This contains approved selections and suggestions. Contact the Organist prior to your wedding and make musical selections at least 30 days prior to the wedding! Thanks for your attention to these items. May God bless you as you plan for your special day!

FOR MORE INFORMATION, CONTACT THE CHURCH OFFICE (843) 722-8449 or [email protected] The Wedding Staff Trinity United Methodist Church

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HOW TO FORM THE ORDER OF WORSHIP FOR YOUR SERVICE OF CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE Couples, when you are forming your order of worship for your service and bulletin, it should follow the pattern of the Service of Christian Marriage of The United Methodist Church below. The Service of Christian marriage of the United Methodist Church is the liturgy that will be used for your wedding. Should you desire to deviate from it a bit, you need the permission of the Trinity UMC pastor. Be sure to e-mail your order of worship to the pastor at [email protected] for approval well before you go to print your bulletins. Kindly put this on your “to-do” list. By the way, consider having a congregational hymn or two! This increases participation by those who have come to your wedding. Also consider having Holy Communion, which would be served to the entire congregation. Neither congregational hymns nor Holy Communion or mandatory, but they are encouraged. You can find the text of The Service of Christian Marriage in your local United Methodist Church hymnal, pages 864-869. The Trinity UMC pastor would be pleased to go over it with you.

THE SERVICE OF CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE PRELUDE SEATING OF THE GRANDMOTHERS SEATING OF THE MOTHERS CHIMING OF THE HOUR PROCESSION OF THE WEDDING PARTY PROCESSION OF THE BRIDE GREETING DECLARATION OF INTENTION PRESENTATION OF THE BRIDE RESPONSE OF THE FAMILIES AND PEOPLE PRAYER SCRIPTURE LESSON(S) HOMILY EXCHANGE OF VOWS BLESSING AND EXCHANGE OF RINGS DECLARATION OF MARRIAGE INTERCESSORY PRAYER BLESSING OF THE MARRIAGE [HOLY COMMUNION] DISMISSAL WITH BLESSING RECESSIONAL POSTLUDE

(If you desire one or more congregational hymns, they are commonly inserted 1) before or after the Scripture Lesson(s), 2) before the Blessing of the Marriage, or 3) before the Dismissal with Blessing.

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WEDDING MUSIC SELECTION GUIDE WEDDING DATE: _____________________________________

TIME: _____________________________________________

BRIDE: ______________________________________________

GROOM: ____________________________________________

MUSIC As soon as possible, please contact Daniell Smith, Trinity UMC’s Director of Music Ministry/Organist, at (843) 324-6811 (cell) or [email protected] to begin discussing music for your wedding. Kindly do not delay! When you have completed your selections, e-mail this form to her. You do not need to send this page with your initial information form and deposit. Most couples select the following music for their wedding:  One processional for seating mothers and other family members.  A second processional for entrance of the wedding party.  A third processional for entrance of the bride.  One recessional for wedding party and mothers/family We encourage a congregational hymn (one that the congregation can sing), too, but this is not mandatory. The music selections listed below are suggestions. Pieces other than the ones listed below may be selected with approval from the church. Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring

J. S. Bach

Processional

Canon in D

Johann Pachelbel

Processional

Sheep May Safely Graze

J. S. Bach

Processional

Trumpet Tune

Henry Purcell

Trumpet Voluntary (also titled “Prince of Denmarks’ March")

Jeremiah Clarke

Processional

Rigaudon

André Campra

Processional

Sheep May Safely Graze

J. S. Bach

Processional

Air on the G String

J. S. Bach

Processional

“Air” from Water Music

G. F. Handel

Processional

Prelude to the Te Deum

M. Charpentier

Processional or Recessional

Rondeau

J. Mouret

Processional or Recessional

“Hornpipe” from Water Music

G. F. Handel

Processional or Recessional

“Overture” from Royal Fireworks Music

G. F. Handel

Processional or Recessional

“The Rejoicing” from Royal Fireworks

G. F. Handel

Processional or Recessional

Ode to Joy

L. Beethoven

Processional or Recessional

Processional or Recessional

Daniell Smith, Director of Music Ministry/Organist Trinity United Methodist Church Charleston, South Carolina (843) 324-6811 (cell); [email protected]

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Trinity United Methodist Church 273 Meeting Street, Charleston, South Carolina 29401 (843) 722.8449 [email protected] www.trinityumccharleston.com

SERVICE OF CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE INFORMATION FORM This form must be fully completed and mailed with your deposit to reserve a wedding date on the church calendar. Check wedding dates with Trinity’s church secretary. Before sending in this form, contact Trinity’s pastor, Rev. Daniel Flessas at (843) 442-3013 (c) or (843) 722-8449 (o).

Bride’s Last (Maiden) Name/Groom’s Last Name __________________/____________________ _______________, ___________________201_ ___:____p.m.

WEDDING DATE

Day of the week

REHEARSAL DATE

Month and day of month

Year

Time

_______________, ___________________201_ ___:____p.m. Day of the week

Month and day of month

Year

Time

APPROXIMATE NUMBER OF PERSONS EXPECTED TO ATTEND THE WEDDING ____________ Name of person making decisions for this wedding ________________________________________ Relationship to bride/groom __________________________________________________________ E-mail ________________________

this person should complete and sign this contract.

Ph. # Cell (_____)_____________ Home (_____)_____________ Work (_____)_______________ BRIDE’S Full Name _________________________________ E-mail ________________________ Ph. # Cell (_____)_____________ Home (_____)_____________ Work (_____)_______________ Current Physical Address ___________________________________________________________ Member of which congregation? ____________________________________________ Church Currently worships at _______________________________ Church in ______________________ Age ____________ Number of previous marriages _______________ Baptized? Y N GROOM’S Full Name ________________________________ E-mail _______________________ Current Physical Address ___________________________________________________________ Ph. # Cell (_____)_____________ Home (_____)_____________ Work (_____)_______________ Member of which congregation? ____________________________________________ Church Currently worships at _______________________________ Church in ______________________ Age ____________ Number of previous marriages _______________ Baptized? Y N -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Office Use Only INITIAL DEPOSIT OF $________ RECEIVED ON _______ PERSONNEL FEES:

FINAL PAYMENT OF $_________ RECEIVED ON______

PSTR ____ WD DIR ____ ORGN____ SXTN ______

RECEIVED ON _______

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FAMILY AND WEDDING PARTY INFORMATION BRIDE’S Mother ____________________________________ Phone _________________________ BRIDE’S Father ____________________________________ Phone _________________________ # of bride’s grandparents (and great-grands) expected to be present at the service _______________ GROOM’S Mother ____________________________________ Phone _______________________ GROOM’S Father ____________________________________ Phone _______________________ # of groom’s grandparents (and great-grands) expected to be present at the service _____________ Maid/Matron of Honor (circle one):________________________ plus _________ bridesmaids (her name) Best Man:___________________________________________ plus _________ groomsmen (his name) Ring Bearer:________________ Age ___ Flower Girl(s) ______________________ Age(s) _____ (must be 5 YOA or older)

(must be 5 YOA or older)

YOU MUST INITIAL EACH ITEM BELOW, THEN SIGN AND DATE. BY DOING SO, YOU, THE BRIDE- AND GROOM-ELECT AGREE TO ABIDE BY TRINITY’S WEDDING POLICY TERMS. ____ 1. I have fully read Trinity’s Wedding Policy and accept and will abide by its rules. ____ 2. I have spoken directly with Trinity’s Pastor about having a wedding at Trinity UMC. I understand that: ____ 3. Trinity’s pastor will officiate the wedding unless he approves other arrangements. ____ 4. The bride and groom will use only the Service of Christian Marriage of The United Methodist Church (pp. 864-869 of The United Methodist Hymnal). ____ 5. Trinity’s Wedding Director will direct the wedding. ____ 6. Full payment of remaining sanctuary and personnel fees are to be made no later than 30 days prior to the wedding. ____ 7. All personnel fees must be paid for Trinity’s Wedding Staff: Rev. Daniel Flessas ($400); Daniell Smith ($300); Helen Robbins, wedding director ($300); and Larry Lightly, sexton ($200). _____ 8. Requests to change rehearsal/wedding times must be made in writing and approved by the pastor.

____ 9. I will ensure that my wedding party arrives on time and reverently for the rehearsal. ____ 10. I will ensure that the photographer and florist abide by Trinity’s Wedding Policy. ____ 11. Florists may not arrive earlier than two hours before the wedding starts unless the bride/groom have made a special request of the wedding director. Such requests must be made at least two weeks before the wedding date.

________________________ Signature of Decisionmaker

__________________________ Date